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10 Gifts You Shouldn’t Give to Your Loved One

by 142 Comments

Thai people are grown up with superstitious beliefs and taboos. Some are still believed to be true, and some are now used to tease friends. Giving a gift is a nice gesture but some items have negative meaning especially to your relationship. Here are 10 presents some Thai people might consider bringing bad luck;

1. Shoes รองเท้า /rawng – táao/

If you buy shoes for your girlfriend or boyfriend, it is believed that it will cause the break up because shoes need to be in pair, a couple who are dating but not living together could be cursed to go different ways.

 2. Black clothes เสื้อผ้าสีดำ /sûea-pâa sǐi dam/

This item is frightening. Do not give black clothing because ancient Thai people consider black as the colour of pain and sadness used for mourning. If you give a black cloth to someone, you will go to that person’s funeral.

3. Watch / Clock นาฬิกา /naa-lí-gaa/

It is believed that if your loved one gives you a watch or clock, your relationship might be over like the clock stops ticking.

4. Perfume น้ำหอม /náam-hăwm/

As Thai people like to say if you don’t believe it, don’t disparage it. Many Thai think giving perfume to your partner could make your love lessen like the scent of the perfume that is fade away over time.

 5. Photograph of Yourself รูปถ่าย /rûup-tàai/

Another thing that you absolutely don’t want to give to your darling is the photo of yourself because giving a photo for memory when you are apart.

 6. Handkerchief ผ้าเช็ดหน้า /pâa-chét-nâa/

Thai believe that handkerchief is used for wiping tears, so someone who receives a handkerchief as a gift will lose their tears. If you don’t want your beloved to cry, avoid giving this item.

7. Sharp objects ของมีคม /kăwng mii kom/

It is believed that giving sharp objects as a gift will bring the receiver danger, bad luck.

 8. Comb หวี /wǐi/

Thai people compare relationship to the teeth of a comb, you don’t want to go apart like the comb’s teeth.

9. Brooch เข็มกลัด /kĕm-glàt/

A brooch is a beautiful accessory but Thai believe that giving a brooch is like stabbing that person’s heart, creating pain and argument.

 10. Glassware เครื่องแก้ว /krûeang gâew/

It is a common gift. Superstition has it that if the glassware is broken it means the relationship is also destroyed.

Some Thai people give a small amount of money like one Baht or ten Baht to a person who gives the present as if they purchase it, so it doesn’t bring them bad luck.

Gift Giving Tips:

  • If you are given a gift, it is considered rude to rip the wrapping paper. Carefully remove the wrapping, fold and set aside.
  • Flowers is appropriate gift. Avoid marigolds or carnations as they are associated with funerals or lotus as it is used for worship Buddha image.

Many male readers ask about my gift ideas for a special someone. Here are some suggestions what ladies like;

  • Diamonds are a girl’s best friends! If you look for a special gift, a pair of small diamond earrings or a necklace with a diamond pendant is a lovely way to express your eternal love to your significant other.

  • Good quality beauty products such as Tom Ford lipstick, Dior eyeshadow palette,  Chanel powder blush etc. It is nice to embrace natural beauty but makeup is fun!

  •  A pretty handbag. For women, purses are like friends, you can’t have too many!

  • Roses are always sweet thing. Whether you give the full dozen or just a single stem, roses say “I Love You” like no other flower.
  • Lastly I would like to note that love doesn’t equal expensive gifts, the price tag on the gift you buy doesn’t matter for a recipient. Just show your love by making everyday special – cooking a nice meal for them, giving a compliment how beautiful they look, ask “how are you – really?”, saying magical words “thank you”, “I’m sorry” and forgive their mistakes.

 I wish you all the best ,joy ,happiness and love!

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Hello,
    I am going through a very hard time right now. I gave perfume to my boyfriend as a gift and after a month or so, we broke up. I read your suggestions to ask for small amount of money, but i don’t think it’s possible in my situation. Do you think there is any other way to undo this?
    Hoping to hear from you soon!!

    Simran

    Reply

    • Dear Simran, I am sorry to hear about your relationship problem. Sometimes we need to accept what’s done is done, you need to just get on with things. I wish you all the best and you will find someone special who deserve you in the future.

      Reply

      • I hear you 😔😔
        But i still wanna keep trying, cause it’s hurting me really bad. I wanted it to work so much, and i wanna try everything that i can. Please, if you could give me any other way 😢😢
        Please 🙏🏻🙏🏻

        Reply

  2. Don’t know about the rest but for perfumes, even I have heard that gifting those isn’t a good idea. Reading this gives me some reason to believe that. And there are different things for different regions, so that might be a good idea for gifting perfume on some other land.

    Reply

  4. Hey I bought the person I was dating shows last August and gave them to them in the first week of Oct. We broke up the first week of Nov. Things have been rocky ever since and even though we have feelings for each other they still haven’t wanted to get back together. What do I do? Do we need to destroy the shoes?

    Reply

    • Sorry i’m new to hearing these things … And i’m trying to understand this . So if I give my boyfriend a pair of shoes we are going to breakup? Because shoes is together/pair and we are not a pair because we don’t live together ? And why cant we give them an watch too? And also is this a religion rules or ???

      Reply

  5. It’s funny how some of these are similar to old English superstitions! Giving a pair of shoes to a loved one was bad luck, as they could ‘walk out of the relationship/walk away’, giving sharp objects could ‘cut’ the relationship apart, etc. How neat!

    Reply

    • Ok , i’m new to this. And I just heard some say this . So your telling me if I give my boyfriend a pair of shoes we re going to breakup …. Because shoes are a pair/together and if we not leaving in the same house so we would breakup? And what about a watch too?? Sorry I been looking this up on a lot of sites and there not answering my questions. And is this a religion or just in general?

      -Melania

      Reply

  6. Hi! I gave a watch and a black tshirt to my love, is there any cure to relive the relationship ? Or if i already gave them these gifts what should i do to contradict the superstitions or effect of the gifts that i have given to him so that our relation will continue. Thanks

    Reply

      • Hi!
        In just wanna ask,,I buy lots of shoes and watch and umbrella as a present to my friends and family,,but I read an article that’s all the bad luck to give,,,should I not give it to them?thank u,,,

        Reply

        • I am sorry for my late reply. If you believe in superstitions then you should change the gifts to something else, but if you feel that it doesn’t matter then those gifts are nice things to give. 🙂

          Reply

  9. Here in North America, shoes and perfume are considered nice gifts for a woman. However, wise men here always avoid giving anything such as a vacuum, broom, cleaning supplies, weight loss supplements, or tools unless they definitely want to break up! : D

    Reply

  10. I buy my girlfriend shoes today and are send her the picture of the shoe and she so happy for the shoe….please what can are do give her the shoe or not?

    Reply

  11. Hy,
    I have given shoes and couple keychain (a part of which is with me too) to my boyfriend and we don’t have a good relationship. He doesn’t believe in superstition but i do if i will ask him some portion of money (as mentioned in most of the commments) for the gifted shoes and keychain he will never be agree for the same…..what to do now?? Plz help

    Reply

    • Hi Riya, I am sorry to hear that. There is nothing I am aware of besides asking for the money for the gift you have given. I hope your relationship problem will be solved. Communication is the key. Best wishes.

      Reply

    • Just ask him for a coin or 10 rupee note as my fiance did when he gifted me a watch n say him that u just want it for some reason coz relationship is precious than gifts. And if for gifts relationship is in danger u must take a coin or a little amount

      Reply

  12. I already had given my boyfriend a wallet long time ago in his birthday … May be 2 years ago without money i was not aware about that time. That wallet should never given empty .. what should I do know .. ? Should I take some money from him for the purse?? Will it remove bad luck ?? Plz help..

    Reply

  15. Hello ma’am I received one pocket square (hanky ))
    One wrist watch on my 25th birth day by my love & suddenly our relation start breaking n now its over I just want know can I do something else with watch & pocket square to get back my love in my life

    Reply

  23. Hi.. I already bought a perfume for my bf for his birthday. But then i am confused after reading your blog but I really want to give since i bought that for him. Tell me any solution.

    Reply

    • It’s just superstition. Some lesser educated country folk might take it a tad too serious but most know it’s just the tales of old. My girlfriend loves perfume, watches and pretty much most things on that list and would laugh at the thought of not giving /receiving based on some crazy myths.

      Reply

  25. Hi , I taught to gift my bf a wrist watch as a valentine gift ,,, but after reading ur article I am bit confused. Or shall I give him money n ask him to purchase a gift of his own ? Or buy a watch fr himself?? Will that have any effect on these superstition ?? Because I Believe in superstition… so plz help me in this

    Reply

  26. I believe on this article. I have experiences already. My bf gave me a watch and both of us lost love and separate ways then after. Also, my best friend gave me a comb because she knew i was searching on this. I accepted but without any reasons i felt boring staying with her. Now i came to this article for such reasons. Thanks for this. I can avoid accepting or giving unnecessary gifts in the future.

    Reply

  29. Hello.. Thnx for the lovely article.. I was thinking of gifting my bf a pen but does pen come under a sharp objects.. Coz I did gift my earlier two bf with pens And aftertht bad luck did came to them.. After reading ur article I realised tht.. Kindly guide wht can I gift my bf?
    Thnx

    Reply

  30. hi my boyfriend give me perfume and we suddenly brkup I don’t know why . suddenly he got new girlfriend . and everything happen just in a month . now what I did 🙁 please could you help me . if there’s any idea tell me please

    Reply

  32. hlo ….I’m very worried right now…actually i don’t have idea even i didn’t read this article before actually i gift my boyfriend a black shirts on his birthday. im very much tens about this backluck after reading this article… so please suggest me something.

    Reply

  33. My life my boyfriend gifted me mirror because I demanded of it,but when I read this article I felt sad,what should I do??should it empact negatively in our relationship??…….what should I do with this mirror??

    Reply

    • Hi Saraswati, please don’t worry about it. These are superstitions but if you are worried you can give them a small amount of money like 10 Baht to your boyfriend to make it like you bought it from him.

      Reply

  35. Um, hello. I had recieved a handkerchief as gift from my guy many months ago, follwing which our relationship started deteriorating. So, when I heard about this superstition I decided to throw the handky away. Could it possibly be like will there be any effect for me having done so? I mean I just want the things to work, It’s been so stressful with all the constant fighting.

    Reply

    • I am sorry to hear about your relationship not going well. I wrote this article to share some of the Thai superstitions. Personally I don’t think giving and receiving any gift cause a problem in a relationship. I wish things will work well for you.

      Reply

    • Congratulations to your parents wedding anniversary. What about a nice set of tableware or a high quality bedding set? My parents would appreciate that. 🙂

      Reply

  38. May I give a keychain to.my GF as gift? And Ms. Moderator I gave her a watch in our early days of our relationship. We are going strong together as the times goes by. But reading your article gives me some chills 🙁

    Reply

  40. I once bought a pair of shoes for my ex-husband to wear on our wedding’s day, after 6 years we divorced. I exchanged perfume gift with my ex-boyfriend, we broke up after 4 months. When I visited my current boyfriend city before I left I didn’t have flip flop to wear so he gave me his slipper to wear it and keep it till he comes to my city. I told him I don’t want to do that because I am scared that we both will end up with breaking up. He told me, don’t be stupid and don’t trust on those. You are going to keep it, I am not giving you as a gift.When I got back home I was about to mail it after a couple but somehow I was busy. After a week we fought and cut off contact for over a week. Yesterday he told me I am done with you. Even though I called him many times he never returns my phone call, I think it because of his slipper. Should I send him back or like you said should I send him the small amount of money and consider as I bought it. Please, advice.

    Reply

    • I am sorry to hear about you and your ex break up. I am afraid I can’t give any advice on this matter. These bad gifts are just superstitions. I wish you all the best.

      Reply

  45. Hello,
    I bought a perfume and a pair of black T shirt for my girlfriend and me. I want to give perfume to my gf to use every day. How should i give? I afraid…

    Reply

  47. I had purchased clock (Wrist Watch) for my friend on 21 may 2015.
    I put it in front of her as an gift on 26 may 2015, but she didn’t accepted it on that time.
    Later I moved on journey but we had big quarrel on phone on 6 June 2015.
    From that day of quarrel she is not willing to talk with me.
    I haven’t gifted her the clock but purchasing clock for her is the reason behind this?

    Reply

  48. I have gifted my boyfriend a pair of shoe.But we are still together .This year also i have ordered a pair of shoe. … i am afraid now…. is there any remedy for that?

    Reply

    • Personally I think it is just a superstition. If you would like to do something, some people say you can ask the gift receiver to give you a small amount of money like 5 Baht or 10 Baht to make it like he bought it from you. 🙂

      Reply

  49. I bought my Thai GF several pairs of shoes and she was as happy as can be.

    She said nobody ever bought shoes for her before. Perhaps because of the superstition?.

    I also bought her some lingerie. Was that appropriate? She wore it the next day and she looked most lovely, so I guess/hope it was OK. 🙂

    Reply

  50. Offering a bottle of champagne is also another good idea isn’t it?

    There seem to be lots of taboos about shoes in Thaï and people like to photography them no?

    Thank you for this useful information Mod

    Reply

  51. Great information, Ajarn Mod. I gave my wife shoes after a trip to Bali. She was polite enough not to make a big deal about it.

    Have you done a story on Thai beliefs as they relate to symbolism in dreams? If not, that’s usually a fun topic.

    Reply

  54. Hi Mod,

    Just 1 week ago my GF gifted me shoes & Hanky

    after 1 week our relationship had ended. I don’t think it was a result of the gift of the shoes or Hanky

    Reply

  55. Hi Kru Mod,
    I once gave a girlfriend a pair of shoes and within 3 months our relationship had ended. I don’t think it was a result of the gift of the shoes, I think it was the result of the gift of an Isuzu D-max by her new boyfriend that was the cause, lol.

    Reply

  60. Interesting article! Thanks for sharing. Some of the superstitions are very similar to those of the Chinese especially the first one about shoes.

    Just to share-the clock/watch superstition arises because the phrase ‘giving a clock’ in Chinese sounds very similar to a phrase used for funerals so that is why it’s considered taboo for us Chinese. Who knows? We may share similar superstitions because of our shared ancestry with the Chinese-Thais.

    Also, the italicised paragraph about the recipients of such taboo gifts handing over token amounts of money to ward off the superstition is common practice for us as well!

    Happy Valentine’s Day to Kru Mod and to my learners of the beautiful Thai language!

    Reply

  62. 🙂 Interesting so now I have just thrown all those lovely gifts I bought for you lets see ?

    Ferrari as that is a car that will take you away very fast

    Gold bracelet as that will tarnish and fade away

    Mansion as that will eventually fall down too

    So I decided for you Mod a cup of tea as its nice and warm and not expensive

    Keep up the good work Kru Mod you are super lovely na ka

    Say hi to MBK for me

    🙂

    Mark

    Reply

  63. ha! good post Mod! I think I gave my husband three of those in the past ten years! We’re still together because it’s LOVE! But you’re right I won’t push it for a next time. I like your site, and I hope you come see mine. 🙂 Choke Dee na ka! Joy B (JoysThaiFood)

    Reply

    • Thank you for reading my post. I am happy to hear that you enjoyed it:)
      Your website looks good! I will use some of your food recipe. Thank you for sharing.

      Reply

  64. Hello, dear Mod,

    that’s really most interesting. I did not know any one of these items.
    A suggestion: could you tell us WHAT to give to Thai people?
    After this article I am absolutely lost.

    I once bought a pair of shoes for a lady – not too long after that I never saw her again.
    I once bought some perfume for a lady – not too long after that I never saw her again.
    A lady once gave me a photo of herself – not too long after that I never saw her again.
    I once gave a beautiful blue lotus to a lady – she was not pleased at all, and I was confused, I did not know why.

    Thank you so much for your article.
    I am not superstitious, really, but I will be more clever from now on.

    Gerhard

    Reply

    • Sawatdee ka Gerhard, I am sorry to hear about that.
      There are many things women like, it depends on her character. Here are some ideas; most girls like cosmetics so you could give a good lipstick or an eyeshadow palette, or a set of facial treatment. Jewellery is also lovely, perhaps a necklace or bracelet. Good luck 🙂

      Reply

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